Posts Tagged ‘Audio’

First Church of Zuppuology

Church of Zuppuology 2
R. Gayle Shiester:

Welcome to the First Church of Zuppuology!

Don’t you be Tarot-fied
We are here to help you fill the cultural vacuum
Don’t you be Tarot-fied
Just pay your dues to the estate of the founder

FRONK ZUPPU!!! FRONK ZUPPU!!!

Don’t try to look behind his eyes
(They are made of paper and/or pixels)
You don’t wanna know what he has seen
Don’t you ever try to look behind his eyes
(They are made of paper and/or pixels)
You don’t ever wanna know what they have seen

Only the First Church of Zuppuology knows the truth of Zuppu
Only We know the true way to Zuppu knowledge
Don’t mess with Zuppu blasphemy and Zuppu heretics
But follow the true path of Zuppu to Laurel Canyon

Zuppu Freak:

Oh Mystical Advisor
What is my problem, tell me
Can you see?

R. Gayle Shiester:

Well, you have nothing to fear, my son!
You are a Latent Litigation Fetishist,
It appears to me!

Zuppu Freak:

That all seems very, very strange
I have never craved a lawyer
Or been on a jury before

R. Gayle Shiester:

A Latent Litigation Fetishist
Is a person who refuses to admit to his or herself
That sexual gratification can only be achieved
Through the use of THE LAW . . .
Get the picture?

Zuppu Freak:

Are you telling me
I should go into a courtroom now
Mr. Gayle?

R. Gayle Shiester:

No, my son!
You must go into
BERGER KAHN
(the Club)

Zuppu Freak:

What?

R. Gayle Shiester:

And you will have

Zuppu Freak:

Eh?

R. Gayle Shiester:

A lot of fun!
That’s where they all live . . .
So if you want a
Lawyer to love you
You’ll have to go in there
‘N get you one

Zuppu Freak:

That seems simple enough . . .

R. Gayle Shiester:

But if you want a really GOOD one,
You’ll have to learn a foreign language . . .

Zuppu Freak:

German, for instance?

R. Gayle Shiester:

That’s right . . .
A lot of really cute ones come from over there!
These lawyers really go for a guy dressed up like a tribute band who can speak German (you know what I mean) . . .
(Fifty bucks, please)

Inside BERGER KAHN:

Little ugly lawyers dance around with tribute bands with names like Protect/Object, Kilt Ugly Ratio, Bogus Pimps, Muffled Men and Shocked Yembouties . . . and when Zuppu freak sees this one lawyer, with an enormous supeonas covered with . . . he BURSTS INTO SONG . . .

Before leaving the First Church of Zuppuology . . . and for small introductory fee . . . you can briefly enter the Ye Old Vault itself and stand in the very presence of an actual replica of the guitar that Hundrox gave Zuppu as a gift . . . also be awed by our newly renovated Utility Music Research Kitchenette — now completely redesigned and automated in line with our new corporate philosophy: Attack Anyone at Anytime For No Reason At All. Then relax in our new lounge PEW 38 and refresh yourself with a nice Freak Up Ale or a Kill Ugly Stout, before stopping by our friendly store to buy your entire family a Fronk Zuppu T-Shirt (comes in all sizes and made with care by happy Honduran workers), Portrait-sized jigsaw puzzles and posters of our founder . . . Pay toilets available in the atrium, just ask our lovely hostess Lucille for change.

kill ugly stout small

All terrestrial, extraterrestrial, and interdimensional rights reserved from this moment until the end of time itself. All music, art, images, text and other content are vicariously copyrighted for the world & the universe & beyond © The First Church of Zuppuology (unless otherwise noted). Zuppu, Fronk Zuppu & The Virgin Beard and other various hairs as of yet not grown are marks belonging to the First Church of Zuppuology. All Rights Reserved. Register & Vote for Hillary. Free Buttons for members.

Zuppu himself

This post is copyleft.

Year of the Freak: February (the weesa)

In honor of that special individual who has stuck by the freak through the long years of freakdom — be it a friend, a girlfriend, boyfriend, spouse, mate, ex-wife or ex-husband (hey, you can’t expect everyone to stick around: twenty years is a very, very long time) — for helping to steal hub caps, for listening to those same favorite FZ/MOI albums and tracks over and over again, for hearing those same FZ/MOI anecdotes for the umpteenth time: this post is for you.

The weesa (she’s so divine)

Howard Kaylan Interview

When Howard Kaylan and Mark Volman joined the Mothers, they were used to being judged by the last record they made. “That’s bullshit!” Frank said. “Your life is your artistic canvas…” Hear more about this, as well as more on the history of The Turtles, The Mothers, Flo & Eddie, and his solo project on the 4-part Podcast interview with Howard Kaylan: Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four.

Burnt Weeny Sandwich, 1969

This document of the original Mothers of Invention, mostly set to the music from Uncle Meat (with the exception of “The Theme from Burnt Weeny Sandwich” from Burnt Weeny Sandwich), originally broadcast on April 30th, 1969, as part of The Dilexi Series for KQED TV, San Francisco, California, shows a young Gail, early Blackouts footage, Mothers live with the GTOs, Captain Beefheart & His Magic Band, the Berlin 1968 riot, and much more. Total length: 18 min. B&W and color.
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Thanks to jane23 for the tip…

Zappa Coverbands on MySpace

Directly from Michigan, U.S.A. is Mokum and Yooper with their unique cover of “Directly From My Heart To You.” And from Pavia, Italy, is the tribute band MN e i CONTENUTI with covers of “The Grand Wazoo,” “Dirty Love,” “Eat That Question” and “Peaches en Regalia.” Smooth listening.


No foolin’…

I Come From Nowhere — Zappa or Zoloft?

Are you sad? Take a pill. Stressed out? Take this pill. Depressed? Take that pill. Did Zappa envisage the present-day mass marketing of drugs like Prozac, Zoloft, Paxil — drugs designed and marketed to modulate your brain chemistry and intended to make you less depressed, more sociable, more happy at work; aimed at altering your mood or “changing” the way you think, feel and act: with over tens of billions of dollars in annual sales and 35 million users worldwide — when he composed the song “I Come From Nowhere“?

According to The American Music Therapy Association (AMTA):

Listening to music for at least 20 minutes each day can help slow down your heart rate and other body functions and can help you deal with the root causes of depression, such as anger, frustration, sadness or anxiety.

I don’t know about you, but not only does 20 minutes of Frank Zappa each day do good for my bodily functions, but the image of that pussy in headphones alone brings a smile to my face…

Live from The Pier in NYC 1984

On the sixth month anniversary of my divorce judgement, and fulfilling the requests of two KUR aficionados, here’s an excellent cover of The Allman Brothers Band classic “Whipping Post” by Frank Zappa’s 1984 band (solos and all). Hey, don’t you feel better already…