The Continuing Saga Of Franko Zappacio

1. part
Gail Zappa discovers that Isaak is Jane23’s real child’s father. Jane23 asks his husband not to take away Gail Zappa’s position, together wanted it to make jump they. Paul Sempschi obliged to reveal the old secret. His mother just turns up in this moment, that let Dweezil Zappa put his cloak out from the house. Xorg and Jane23 decided that they go abroad again.

“A telenovela is a limited-run television serial melodrama of the type made famous in Latin America.” Oh yes. And this is our cheap version – a story generated totally and exclusively by machines: after I’ve given the names, the thing called Brazilizator made up the story, and after it (“I’m also programmed for conversational English!”) an online translator - voilá! – turned it into “English”. No “human elements” or other ulterior motives added! :-)

Curious?

2. part
Arthur Barrow and Moon Zappa want to travel to Bariloche after Isaak, who is preparing to visit in a business matter there and Gail Zappa goes with him, instead of Jane23. Jane23′s mother, Dr. Sharleena in girlhood served in wealthy De La Torre family, fell in love with Xorg De La Torre. The child shows him his false registration certificate, in which she appears as the child’s mother, and Frank Zappa his father. The two lovers find each other out finally. Maroual – onto Evelin urging – decides in that manner, that all that sticks by his wife, until it does not get back on its feet.

3. part
Jane23 reassures it with speaking to major Bernard a following day. The grimace of the fate, that the terrible crime signifies the beginning of a new life. Arthur Barrow tries onto Urbangrafitto soul to speak, that let him allow him to be his lawyer. Jane23 was being brought up in a convent after his parents gave it up in his infancy. Pamela DesBarres and Eddie compare it with his mother.

4. part
Mary Lou contemplates his fate desperately and his father is incapable of it despite his will, that let Ruth Undrwood be his mother. Urbangrafitto breaks out from the prison. Mary Lou faints in the bathroom between mysterious circumstances. Maroual is not fond of the boy though, but when he finds it out, that Jane23 pregnant, promises for him to help to clear up his husband. Everybody goes away onto the cock-fight where they have fun well.

5. part
The new-born receives name Jane23. Jane23 goes away to a lawyer who informs her that she was millionaire by way of his heritage again. Urbangrafitto yet just the gate grabs hold of his wife. Paul Sempschi informs Moon Zappa about that Jane23 expects a baby. Dweezil Zappa is hostile in the future.

6. part
He has two desires later with twenty years when he moves into Lima: to find his parents and to find the true love. Mary Lou is in hospital. Gail Zappa calls Bernard’s office, and makes an anonymous announcement in Mitral freight from a seated drug. Mary Lou and Jane23 sympathize, and realizes that Dweezil Zappa could be the little girl’s husband. Don Preston a smuggler is training himself for an action.

7. part
Frank Zappa tells Evelin and Ruth Underwood that Mary Lou is Ruth Underwood’s daughter. Jane23 admits that her love: Dweezil Zappa. Moon Zappa asks Arthur Barrow’s friend to be his father’s lawyer. Flo arranges it, that Charva some days let Dweezil Zappa be allowed to be on his flat. The police puts Frank Zappa’s hands a handcuff.

8. part
The young girl takes the man’s heart prisoner prompt. Eddie goes home from New York with little son. Flo starts a mindless spending spree. The police finds the cocaine, and Bernard obliged to believe in Urbangrafitto’s guilt. The malicious gossip is spreading long in the slum Jane23 from her dishonest cash income.

9. part
The two young persons, Charva and Frank Zappa junior they have a share in the heritage in an equal proportion. The two families embarked on a common business venture sometime, though Gail Zappa De La Torre had enough of it, that to share is needed on the incomes. Guzman family the news of the secret marriage strikes it down. Jane23’s mother, Dr. Sharleena in girlhood wealthy served in family De La Torre, fell in love with Xorg De La Torre and she became pregnant. Moon Zappa demands that Urbangrafitto should have it taken away Jane23’s child.

10. part
Jane23 himself grasps hardly what she was getting involved in, may not count on his father though. Arthur Barrow and Moon Zappa follow Isaak in Bariloche, but Gail Zappa catches sight of Arthur Barrow’s face, tactics has to be changed because of this. Flo feels that he is not well, but Isaak does not want to be his doctor left since he is a lover into the girl. Frank Zappa lives pricks of conscience because of his daughter. Charva decides that he ends the play, and Evelin hurries onto his rendezvous.

29 Responses to “The Continuing Saga Of Franko Zappacio”

  1. Hugh says:

    Hmm . . . what would be Gail’s position, besides bending people over?
    Oh, behave!

  2. jane23 says:

    Cool, Dr. Sharl is my mom!!!
    Gaby baby.

  3. Dr Sharleena says:

    …but then we find out we are twins, separated at birth! OMG!!!8888

  4. Balint says:

    Barry somehow disappeared – what a pity… maybe he’ll pop up in the 24th episode. (Also missing: Scott Thunes, Eddie, etc…)

  5. Barry's Imaginary Publisher says:

    Me? I’ve been in a slave colony picking cotton throughout episodes 1 to 10, generally being beaten and abused by the camp’s main guard: Ahmet. In episode 24 I’ll be able to escape the compound by means of a cunning plan devised by my cellmate BergerKahn. Soon after we’ve gotten out though, things start to get hostile between us…

  6. Roland says:

    (Big sigh) Am I an orphan ?

  7. Dr Sharleena says:

    No, you are an “orphan”

  8. bernard says:

    Another funny generator is tha anagram generator.
    It’s http://wordsmith.org/anagram/
    Result for FZ ( relating to this blog): Fan Park Zap.
    You just fill in , let’s say Roland. Result : An Lord;
    Ran Old

  9. Maroual says:

    LOL Balint, this is very funny to see my name in this story ;-)

  10. Roland says:

    The “orphan” is an “An Lord”, well I can with it! ;-)

  11. Roland says:

    Aristotle was not Belgian, the principle of Buddhism is not “every man for himself”, and the London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes.

  12. Roland says:

    Okay nice story so far, but where´s sex & crime? I mean, jane23 is pregnant, but I want to read the action to it!

  13. xorg says:

    Oh No, I don’t believe it! Gail Zappa and I are related by marriage!

  14. Balint says:

    Sorry guys, the story cannot be continued because of the writers’ strike.
    (Strange though that I had to give PLENTY of names [of course beginning with Barry and going to Ahmet, etcetera] and 10 parts was not enough to show them all… And who knows? Maybe sex&crime would have come in the 24th episode, when Roland realizes that Barry’s real twin brother is Isaak, living in Bariloche…)

  15. Roland says:

    … and Bariloche is the home of the industrial Fembots AND the secret holiday resort run by Balint!

  16. giantalbinopenguin says:

    No penguins. Crap.

  17. jane23 says:

    A quote from Dr Sharleena:

    No, you are an “orphan”

    The crux of the biscuit is the “quotation” marks.

  18. bernard says:

    The Story continues.
    And then – all of a sudden – GZ shows up again. Disguised as G. Archer. You’ll see her here: Gail Archer performing a work by Messiaen at the Church of the Heavenly Rest. It’s ” Meditations Conjure Incense, Stained Glass and Devotion”. See : http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/15/arts/music/15arch.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
    And she starts singing ” Tohuvabohu”, in Hebrew, it means ” In the beginning there was light”. Right then she initiated the FZ Foundation, taking care of orphans, pinguins, ” boring” s, and other species eating telephone books, while constantly pretending ” I always put ketchup on my ketchup”.

  19. Roland says:

    Why having automated or software orientated screenplay writing, when there´s bernard.

  20. Barry's Imaginary Publisher says:

    Having lured Major Bernard into her practice (where one can also go to get one’s poodle clipped), Dr Sharleena manages to convince him to swallow a firm batch of Valium pills, under the false pretense of them being what she calls “Fortified Aspirines”. Soon, Major Bernard falls into a deep sleep, and begins to dream of the Ultimate “Guitar” “Solo”…

  21. bernard says:

    My beloved friend & brother Major Bernard doesn’t feel trapped at all.
    Met him today, peeling a pineapple.
    Yes, he is enjoying life.
    He said that he happened to be 37 men at once. Haughty guy.
    And that each and every morning, looking in the mirror, he chooses the minimum , i e three identities.

  22. urbangraffito says:

    A quote from Barry’s Imaginary Publisher:

    Me? I’ve been in a slave colony picking cotton throughout episodes 1 to 10, generally being beaten and abused by the camp’s main guard: Ahmet. In episode 24 I’ll be able to escape the compound by means of a cunning plan devised by my cellmate BergerKahn. Soon after we’ve gotten out though, things start to get hostile between us…

    After slipping from the grips of the police and Major Bernard, our cocaine selling and snorting ex-convict and villian, Urbangraffito, heads down to the cotton picking slave colony where he keeps the entire place under surveillance while devising a means of breaking-out his long-time co-conspirator Barry (they at one time operated a sweat shop making T-shirts with the face of musical icon Paul Williams on both the front and back — stitched day and night by the children and grandchildren of jane23 and Gail Zappa while chained to a kerosene stereo blaring the greatest hits of Tink and his band of Amoks). One thing that Barry did not know, that Urbangraffito had learned from his brief incarceration by Major Bernard, was that his cellmate BergerKahn was in fact an informant for the RIAA and had been setting Barry up for a big fall all along. What Urbangraffito needed was a diversion, something really big…

  23. Roland says:

    “Fortified Aspirines”
    “Guitar”
    “Solo”
    What the hell is going on here?

  24. Barry's Imaginary Publisher says:

    A quote from Barry’s Imaginary Publisher:

    One thing that Barry did not know, that Urbangraffito had learned from his brief incarceration by Major Bernard, was that his cellmate BergerKahn was in fact an informant for the RIAA and had been setting Barry up for a big fall all along. What Urbangraffito needed was a diversion, something really big…

    It is at this exact moment that Barry awakes from uneasy dreams to find himself transformed into a gigantic liability. Episode 24 was, if anything, a future that never came to be, he now realizes. Besides, “who could mistake Barry for Jack Bauer?”, he quips silently as he farts discretely, while at the same time gently scratching his crotch.
    Looking out the window, Barry can tell that early dawn is near. On the bunk beside him, he can see BergerKahn. Fast asleep, Kahn is mumbling inaudible words — his face twitching. Semi-deaf as he is, Barry comes up closer to listen. The words uttered, as far as he can tell, are: “The bault… the bault… must issue bees and de-cyst”…

  25. Roland says:

    Hey – “The bault… the bault… must issue bees and de-cyst” – is a real laugh. Nice one, Barry!

  26. urbangraffito says:

    Arrogantly wiping the post-nasal drippings from his coca-encrusted honker, Urbangraffito smeared his newly wiped dysentery green numies into his damp handkerchief before stuffing it back into the pocket of his shirt. Urbangraffito had a large package (sent to him via air mail only days before from Uncle Meat, his first wife’s second husband’s third cousin’s uncle twice removed) inside his backpack. In the package were the three special items that were absolutely essential to bring an end Barry’s present incarceration: a brown a bronze tasselled fez (which is said to give its wearer unbelievable abilities of persuasion), an orange claw hammer, and a Mystery Horn (which resembled something between a tuba and a sax).
    Performing his own private version of a D.C. Boogie across the cotton plantation, Urbangraffito stopped outside the cell block building where the slaves were kept. From the package in the backpack, he took out the Mystery horn and slung the strap over his head. He then took out the fez and placed it on his head: immediately he felt completely different, stranger, stronger. Definitely not himself. As he turned the corner to enter the building he came face-to face with the camp’s main guard: Ahmet.
    “Who the hell are you?” Ahmet demanded to know, reaching for his weapon: his monstrous, mighty, mcfearless M10.
    “I’m the Grand Wazoo…” Urbangraffito bellowed. “Keeper of the mystic scrolls and rolls of parchment from the Lodge…and I’m a veteran…” Just as Ahmet was about to raise his little M10, Urbangraffito blew into the Mystery Horn. Ahmet dropped unconscious to the ground. Urbangraffito bent over and grabbed the cell block keys from Ahmet’s chain. “And fuck you if you don’t like my hat,” he said.
    “Who are you?” BergerKahn wanted to know when Urbangraffito open the door to their cell.
    “Eat that question!” Urbangraffito responded, handing Barry the orange claw hammer. Barry knew what to do with it.

  27. Barry's Imaginary Publisher says:

    The orange claw hammer feels warm and heavy in Barry’s hand. He may be semi-deaf, but he sure does know what an orange claw hammer will do to a person.
    For a moment he contemplates the merits of past tense story-telling — enough for BergerKahn to reach in the pocket of his mystery robe and whip out a shaving kit. The razor blade flickers as Kahn twists it around Barry’s throat. Urbangraffito, his nose still bleeding from the remnants of his cocaine decisions, is in no shape to help out.
    “Who pays you for this Kahn?”, Barry barely manages to ask, in a desperate attempt to win time. The orange claw hammer… You’re still holding it! It’s good for you! I’m holding it! It’s good for you!
    Kahn grins the way those evil people in the movies tend to do.
    “Gail Zappacio. You do know you’re the father of her webmaster’s sister-in-law’s cousin’s daughter’s mother, do you?”
    Urbangraffito stumbles closer. Looking into BergerKahn’s eyes he comes to realize he’s having to deal with an albino who’s probably intimately related to the Vatican (not that there’s anything inherently wrong with that).
    -”Your mouth…”
    -”What about it, honker boy?”
    -”Your mouth…”
    -”… is your religion…”

  28. urbangraffito says:

    Urbangraffito lifts the Mystery Horn to his lips. He’s about to blow that powerful note that’ll knock everyone out, when suddenly everything goes black.
    “How do you like your new cell mate, Barry?” Ahmet taunts him through the archaic, medieval metal door.
    In the cot across the cell from Barry, Urbangraffito rubs the sore painful bump on the back of his head and slowly comes to the terrible realization that his entire rescue attempt was indeed a well devised ruse to capture him as well as Barry. How could I have been so stupid? It’s those cocaine decisions, running all around my brain. Now they’ve got the Mystery Horn, the fez, the orange claw hammer, Barry and myself. What other mistakes have I made?
    On the other side of the door come the sounds of terrible screams and sick Vincent Price type laughter. Then out of tiny speakers hidden somewhere in the cell emerges the voice of Karen Carpenter…
    Oh my god, this is even worse than…

  29. Jamez says:

    A quote from urbangraffito:

    Urbangraffito lifts the Mystery Horn to his lips. He’s about to blow that powerful note that’ll knock everyone out, when suddenly everything goes black.
    “How do you like your new cell mate, Barry?” Ahmet taunts him through the archaic, medieval metal door.
    In the cot across the cell from Barry, Urbangraffito rubs the sore painful bump on the back of his head and slowly comes to the terrible realization that his entire rescue attempt was indeed a well devised ruse to capture him as well as Barry. How could I have been so stupid? It’s those cocaine decisions, running all around my brain. Now they’ve got the Mystery Horn, the fez, the orange claw hammer, Barry and myself. What other mistakes have I made?
    On the other side of the door come the sounds of terrible screams and sick Vincent Price type laughter. Then out of tiny speakers hidden somewhere in the cell emerges the voice of Karen Carpenter…
    Oh my god, this is even worse than…

    …Dan Qualye’s underpant’s!!