Tossers Unite!


In what must surely be one of the summer’s more bizarre events, hundreds of people are expected to gather in a hall in central London on August 5 to pleasure themselves in aid of charity.

… and what’s more:

Prizes will be on offer for those who clock up the most orgasms and those who can masturbate the longest – the current record, according to the organisers, is a chafing eight-and-a-half hours.

I believe a Woody Allen quote is in order: “Don’t knock masturbation — it’s sex with someone I love.”

Weirdo Cards

If you’re wondering what Dr Sharl and I have been up to lately, wonder no more — introducing: weirdocards dot com! Sure, it’s an eCards service, but one with a twist. Our cards tackle such elusive topics as androgynous gnomes, Outcast Smurfs, Cheese, Slime, Liberated Girls, noses and much more.

Feel free to give the site a whirl, click around, send some cards and let us know what you think. Oh, and did I mention there’s some Zappa there too? :)

Paging John From Beyond

Idiot Morons Forever: a pay-per-view TV “seance” is set to contact the spirit of late Beatle John Lennon.

The programme, on US digital channel In Demand, will feature psychics travelling to sites of significance to the former Beatle, including the Dakota building in New York where he was shot dead in 1980. They will then assemble around a seance table, with infra-red cameras to capture any “presence” in the room.

Yoko Ono’s spokesman Elliot Mintz sums it up nicely: “A pay-per-view seance was never his style.”

Scientology Strikes Again

More Tom “I may be a crackpot but I’m not gay” Cruise news: apparently Viacom pulled last night’s scheduled repeat of the high-rated “Trapped in the Closet” South Park episode after Cruise threatened to cancel all publicity for Mission Impossible 3 if Comedy Central aired the episode that satirizes Scientology and mocks his sexuality again.

Devo 2.0

I was contacted a while ago by someone from Disney Records asking me “to promote Devo 2.0 and to expose new and old fans to their music”. First up: yes, I get email from Disney Records. When you’re done giggling, you may wonder: Who is Devo 2.0?

Devo 2.0 is a group of five talented kids that have re-recorded ten of Devo’s original songs, and added new energy. The original members of Devo played on the album and are very much involved and supportive of the project, which allowing them to pass the timeless music of Devo onto a new generation.

“Say What?!”, indeed. More on Punk News