Archive for February, 2003

Hurry up!

SWISS CHEESE / FIRE! CASINO DE MONTREUX, SUISSE,
4 décembre 1971
is available to download. Just add water, put it in the microwave oven, pick nose for two minutes, and you’ll have another bootleg ready at your disposal. Enjoy! (thanks Gilles from Zappa.es YahooGroups)

Quebec firm sued by Zappas

The family of iconoclastic rock legend Frank Zappa is suing a small Quebec city-based furniture retailer for copyright violation.
They were using Watermelon to sell furnitures and appliances!!! :-O (btw, the statement “In the song, “Joe” joins the “Church of Appliantology” is not exact, no? this is just the imaginary guitar solo…and they even post an excerpt of the song…oh well)

Touch him

Play your own Jim Morrison at will: The Jim Morrison Simulatron. Fiiireee…Me…AAAAWWWWRIGHT…!!!

Men With Ripped Anal Tissue

When you have the time, search YahooGroups. Use Zappa as your search term. Here’s what you’ll come up with:
Men With Breasts
“BOOBIES! HIM GOT BIG BOOBIES! Hi I’m Kiloh and this club is about gynecomastia. To those people who may have strayed here gynecomastia means the development of female like breasts on men.”

And then next thing you know, you’ll stumble upon this:

Ripped Anal Tissue
“Hello my name is Kiloh.This group is for the discussion of anal problems (ripped tissue, hemorroids, weak sphincters) and how to live with them. Some things that cause hemorroids are Me, football, sitting on the toilet reading, and debt.”
This guy Kiloh fun or what?

Forgot To Mention

Erh… did I mention? Dr. Sharleena is visiting! Woohoo! And she’s brought along a digital camera too! So, with all due apologies, here’s the first ever picture of my cat (called Zappa, incidently). Hey, this is a personal page, it had to happen sooner or later…

Golfball-sized lumps of phlegm

Anyone wanting to visit BarryTowers, located somewhere in Asscrack Belgium, take heed of these words from Fraser upon visiting Luba: It’s not a language, it’s some kind of terrible vocal torture, as if people are trying to swallow their own heads while simultaneously attempting to cough up golfball-sized lumps of phlegm. Quite an accurate description, if you ask me.

The Evil Prince

“Evil is one of the great mysteries. It’s hard for philosophers to define the good. It may be even more difficult to define the evil.
But Bush uses it as a push-button, to get all the ignorami lined up behind him. The perfect proof of it is his syllogism: 9/11 was evil. Saddam is evil. All evil is connected. Ergo, Iraq.” — Norman Mailer takes on Bush and war on Iraq.

Whip It Out?

40 out of 60.
“Well done. We can continue to accept you into our society, since at least you have the means to determine where to go to the bathroom. Well, not counting last Christmas in the parkade of that shopping mall. Yeah, that’s right, we know.”

Finders Eaters

“I don’t like to see meat go to waste,” said O’Neil. “There’s nothing wrong with (roadkill). All hunters do it.” — Roadkill Gourmets

Hollywood Assholes

Welcome to Hollywood Assholes. This site is dedicated to all of the pretentious Hollywood know-it-alls who think the rest of America gives a damn about their petty political opinions and destructive vices.”

Plastic People

Lonely Person Devices For The Rich. Get your own, for only $6000!

Paranoid: Low

I just freaked myself out taking this personality disorder test because, well, I don’t seem to have any disorder apparently. Paranoid: Low; Schizoid: Low; Antisocial: Low; Borderline: Low; Histrionic: Low; Narcissistic: Low; Obsessive Compulsive: Low; etc… But I want to be one of those interesting bi-polar people mommie! … Yourself?

You Are Not Alone

Got a song stuck in your head? You Are Not Alone: “Kellaris’s previous research into the phenomenon of earworms revealed that “sticky” songs are those that are relatively simple, repetitive, and contain an element that surprises the listener. This incongruous element can be an interrupted pattern, or something that violates expectations of what comes next.” See also here

Boy Wonder I Love You

SOFA points out that, following his request, Burt Ward’s Boy Wonder I Love You has been added to miserablemelodies.com. Classic!

TheBigNote’s latest update

TheBigNote have updated their Musibrarium! The Vault contains an imaginary Live Zoot Allures, while the Sidemen section focuses on “an FZ band that never was”. You’ll also find some rather wonderful member contributions there…