Author Archives: Barry's Imaginary Publisher

In the words of the ever eloquent Woody Allen: “It’s a giant tit!”

I just had a guy with an orange wig on his head and an overwhelming alcoholic aroma come in and prepare 40 hot-dogs in my kitchen, upon which two girls were plucked from the street and asked if they would … Continue reading →

If you ask me it had better remained undiscovered: “Is there anything we don’t know about Celine Dion? We seem to know all. Yet, there’s one thing that remains undiscovered – Celine’s Dreams.”

So you thought there wouldn’t be a Friday Boot cuz Gilles’ on holiday, eh? Wrong! Today’s excursion brings us back to Washington, November 11, 1972. An excellent concert from the Petite Wazoo era (part two next week)…

Meet Pat. Pat likes Frank Zappa music. Pat also likes to molest statues. It’s a family affair.

Some funny reading while you’re listening to Joe’s Garage: “Bruce Rumery paid for a newspaper advertisement in July 2001 looking for an assistant for the rock band Creed. When women responded to the ad, Rumery propositioned sex as part of … Continue reading →

Well I must thank Kevin for mentioning KUR in MetaFilter (of all places). An actual link would’ve been nice though! :) If you’re going “WTF is MeFi?”, read this concise Survival Guide (unless you like your meta to be really … Continue reading →

Flash mobbing: it’s sweeping the ocean. Think of what an FZ oriented flash mob could do… Why, we could be reciting Sam With The Showing Scalp Flat Top, sniff some panties, use deVICES, bring in girls from Edward’s Airforce Base, … Continue reading →

“I just started taking penis enlargement pills. Will they really work? I’ll chronicle my experience here.”

Joining Ahhnuld and Arnold, now Gail Zappa is also running for CA governor.

“I am Dr.ZIZIWANI ALEX Director of Project, South Africa Ministry of Mining & Natural Resources. I am making this contact with you based on the committee’s need for an individual/company who is willing to assist us with a solution to … Continue reading →

69.95 boy, give her it a try…

Paul is dead! No really!

I bet you’re finding this as hilareous as I am: — How many Frank Zappa’s does it take to change a light bulb? — None, the light bulb is not dead, it just smells funny.

No, sadly for me, I’m not on an exotic island getting pleasantly drunk while socializing with pleasantly built local beauties. Instead, I’m (re)reading this. I’m also wondering whether it’s true that FZ’s idea for 200 Motels came to him from … Continue reading →