Wherein Barry Copyrights His Facial Hair

That’s right, you heard right: any and all of my facial hair varieties are hereby copyrighted! You see, being the type of original artist whose legacy is to be protected by my wife upon my biting the big one, I can easily imagine a scenario whereby some East-German lowlife scumbag rips off one of my iconic facial hair designs for a logo concept, thereby confusing fans across the globe.

Copyrighted Facial Hairone, two, three, four, five, six
Click the above image to view all of my Copyrighted Facial Hair Designs (hovering your mouse over the pictures will allow you to navigate back and forth). Any of you so much as think about copying these Facial Hair Designs, I’ll have my Burger Kuhnt scumbag lawyers all over you faster than you can say the words “Accept No Substitute”!

Word to the wise…

23 Responses to “Wherein Barry Copyrights His Facial Hair”

  1. Clenn says:

    Decent <(:
    Lucky me I shaved trough 3 of those stages last week already.
    I ensure you the current doesn’t violate your *C*.

  2. Freon P. Sandoz says:

    Hey. Wait a second. The first picture is already copyrighted by Moby.

  3. steevo says:

    Sorry but your 2 of 6 is copyrighted as well: http://wesclark.com/rrr/sp_lennon.jpg

  4. SOFA - Philostopher/Chef says:

    A wise person once said, “Give a man some stray pubic-esque hairs (generally in his teeth, or – uh – so I’ve heard) and he might take the day off. Teach him to grow a beard and he will be unemployable”…
    Several words to the wise.

    Now, that Gibson SG shaped mole you have on your left buttock – that bad boy should be copyrighted!

  5. urbangraffito says:

    Damn it! Looks like I’ll have to shave, or wear a bag over my head whenever I go out in public! Oh, the disgrace! The shame! The disrepute! How could I have let my facial hair grow to such proportions as this? Will I ever be able to look at myself in the mirror without Barry winking back at me now?

    At least he’s a handsome sonofabitch…

  6. Balint says:

    The first one is a teenage guy, the second is a Maffia person from Sicily, the third is an overeducated Zappa-freak, the fourth is James Bond’s friend from the seventies, the fifth is Franz Joseph I of Austria, the sixth is a guy I don’t remember the name of, though we’d spent a weekend together in Antwerp. 🙂

    Anyway, this must be a photoshop-trick, since the colour (which is also copyrighted, as far as I know) is not real! Hö! 😀

  7. bernard says:

    At your age, Barry, I also had a beard. And it happened to be as ugly as yours.
    By the way remove the hair growing in your nose.
    Do it for the ladies. Some of them just check that first of all, I suppose they want to know if you’ re tidy.

  8. bernard says:

    Facial hair, nostalgia & great songs.

    Just have a look at
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUvG5-UB7_0

    The Kevin Ayers band playing … a song. Called ” May I? “.

    Barry, that’s obviously – just have a look at his beard- Lol Coxhill Lol C. is still up to now an avant garde tenor UK saxophone player.

    The others, that’s
    – Mike Oldfield ( thus : Urbangr. ) playing bass.
    – Dave Bruford ( accordion) , still very much the same : an avant garde classical composer.

    And Kevin Ayers, an absolutely underestimated songwriter.

  9. Sharleena says:

    THE HAIR IN HIS NOSE IS ALSO COPYRIGHTED.
    TAKE CARE OR YOU’LL HEAR FROM MY TEAM OF LAWYERS

  10. bernard says:

    Aha, Sharl.
    Now we know that Barr happens to be controled by , let’s say , lawyers.

  11. bernard says:

    And Barr might indeed end up in a wheelchair, like K. Ayers soul mate the great Robert Wyatt.
    http://nl.youtube.com/watch?v=rHOecqhughU&feature=related

  12. Frank B. says:

    “East-German lowlife scumbag” thats sounds pretty cool. I’ve heard in the news that the hole east-german part will be in near future a “no go area”, so take care of your haircut, if you will go there. Anyway, they don’t treat a future democratic president only because he’s a black guy.
    Freedom? Anyway the wind blows

  13. Barry's Imaginary Publisher says:

    A quote from SOFA – Philostopher/Chef:

    Now, that Gibson SG shaped mole you have on your left buttock – that bad boy should be copyrighted!

    Note to self: block all communication between SOFA and Sharl!

    A quote from Balint:

    Anyway, this must be a photoshop-trick, since the colour (which is also copyrighted, as far as I know) is not real! Hö! 😀

    Apart from the image colorization, no P’shop tricks were used in the making.

    A quote from bernard:

    At your age, Barry, I also had a beard. And it happened to be as ugly as yours.

    You should’ve copyrighted it right there right then.

  14. Clenn says:

    On Robert Wyatt;
    There’s a great documentary floating around on Dimeadozen. BBC, Free Will And Testament.

  15. xorg says:

    FZ: Awright, wait a minute, wait a minute. I have an–I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you’re out there and you’re cute, maybe you’re beautiful, I just want to tell you somethin’–there’s more of us ugly mother-fuckers than you are, hey-y, so watch out. Now . . .

    Dance Contest, Tinsel Town Rebellion, (Frank Zappa, 2LP, Barking Pumpkin PW2 37336, May 11, 1981)

  16. Roland says:

    This morning I had a nice shit. When I looked down into the bowl, it looked like the FZ moustache. Did I touch anybody´s copyright here? I need to know, because I have to flush soon!

  17. urbangraffito says:

    A quote from Roland:

    This morning I had a nice shit. When I looked down into the bowl, it looked like the FZ moustache. Did I touch anybody´s copyright here? I need to know, because I have to flush soon!

    Don’t dare touch that handle, Roland. At least get a camera and photograph it for posterity before you flush it (PlanetZappa might want to interview it first — just kidding guys!).

  18. bernard says:

    Clenn, have a look at http://www.disco-robertwyatt.com/ .
    It’s a man from Paris, who’s putting everything together.

  19. bernard says:

    Intersting question for this FZ related blog :
    Did FZ & R. Wyatt ( Soft Machine) ever met because the one was playing before or after the other one?

    I don’t know, that’s trivia.

    Anyway Wyatt & Soft Machine did a lot of gigs before or after J. Hendrix and they opened Picasso exhibitions in a musical way.

  20. Freon P. Sandoz says:

    Wyatt, Ayers, Oldfield, Bruford? You want strange facial hair, check out Peter Hammill wanting the future now.

    http://tinyurl.com/5o5tgh

  21. Hugh says:

    Barry seeing you in all your hairy stages made me think of this . . .

    Hair Poem–George Carlin

    I’m aware some stare at my hair.
    In fact, to be fair,
    Some really despair of my hair.
    But I don’t care,
    Cause they’re not aware,
    Nor are they debonair.
    In fact, they’re just square.

    They see hair down to there,
    Say, “Beware” and go off on a tear!
    I say, “No fair!”
    A head that’s bare is really nowhere.
    So be like a bear, be fair with your hair!
    Show it you care.
    Wear it to there.
    Or to there.
    Or to there, if you dare!

    My wife bought some hair at a fair, to use as a spare.
    Did I care?
    Au contraire!
    Spare hair is fair!
    In fact, hair can be rare.
    Fred Astaire got no hair,
    Nor does a chair,
    Nor nor a chocolate eclair,
    And where is the hair on a pear?
    Nowhere, mon frere!

    So now that I’ve shared this affair of the hair,
    I’m going to repair to my lair and use Nair, do you care?

    (Beard Poem)

    Here’s my beard.
    Ain’t it weird?
    Don’t be sceered,
    Just a beard

  22. Roland says:

    The Rage & The Furry: Now I realize that the part of the face displayed on the pic reminds me of Che Guevara. That´s it! 🙂

  23. Kill Ugly Radio » Beard Quest says:

    […] would appear I’m not the only one to be experimenting with facial hair. Introducing Jon Dyers Beard Quest: I’ve been growing a […]

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