Truck Driver Divorce

Sometimes, I think we read too much into these things. When I wore the Rev. Eesterhaj hat, I quoted Freud's oft-repeated "sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" comment.

Mebbe this is one of those times. Does it stop any of us? Aw, hell no. It's too much fun.

That said....I think the only puzzling aspect of this set of lyrics is the "string beans to Utah" part, which is probably explained well enough by the Mormon affection for string beans researched by more intrepid contributors here. The reference probably appeared either because FZ encountered it in his ongoing process of soaking up knowledge about everything in general, or because in his physical travels and multiple conversations and encounters along the way someone told him about it at some point and it surfaced. (He did, after all, spend a whole lot of years in the company of a funny little fellow who used to drive a lumber truck and thus spent a lot of time around truckers.)

I think it's amusing that the lyrics take a bit of a gently derisive tone about truckers' secret language. This, coming from a man whose entire musical and lyrical output was peppered with obscure and oblique commentary and references. Is a buried quote from Stravinsky or Nancarrow any less isolated and self-referential than a trucker's 10-4, breaker-breaker, smokey babble? Both languages exclude those outside the circle, after all. Some might call it quaint, the way the Zappanese can snicker at the phrase "desenex burger" while the rest of the universe scratches its head and turns up the volume on American Idol.

But, as Gail and many others have pointed out, all the lyrics have a reference point in observed human behavior. FZ was justifiably amused/disgusted with the whole contrived NashvilleApprovedCountrymusic package, which tends to romanticize things such as truck drivers and the like, and inspire them what likes the music to wear bizarre uniforms, participate in mass orchestrated pseudo-dance behaviors without a hint of irony, and ride mechanical bulls -- preferably while attending Sunday services.

In a larger sense, however, the whole divorce idea is an opportunity to take yet another another well-deserved poke at Mr. (and Mrs.) America's sexual self-repression and internal dishonesty, a concept not confined to countryfans and truckers, but certainly made obvious and hugely visible by this group on a regular basis in peculiarly colorful ways.

My lovely wife is a fan of the Oprah. Since she not only tolerates my Zappa preoccupations but encourages and supports them unconditionally, the least I can do is support her in this. Could be much worse, after all. At any rate....one show that ran recently concerned WEDDING MADNESS, and I found it quite interesting. It was filled with stories of women (yes, primarily women, thanks to the ole cultural conditioning thingy) and couples who faced ruined or damaged relationships due to turmoil over the wedding itself, and the subsequent and inevitable letdown after the wedding/honeymoon period had passed. We're talking about people who were so focused on DE WEDDIN' DAY that they were willing, with little hesitation, to put themselves into low-to-middle 5-figure debt to achieve the ULTIMATE MAGICAL FAIRYTALE WEDDING EXPERIENCE. What was most interesting, to me, was that none of these folks spoke in any way about being focused on the long-term of what their relationship would look like and how each of them would live within it. Some were already divorced, some were contemplating it, some were headed that way without knowing it, as a result.

I realize this was just a few people talking during a 60-minute televsion show -- but I absolutely believe the behavior and attitudes are widespread and astonishingly pervasive.

This comes back to the self-dishonesty issue in a big way. Yours truly certainly has contributed to the divorce industry -- twice, in fact -- so I do bring a certain amount of dumbshit expertise to this discussion. But divorce as a by-product of a lack of self-awareness and/or internal honesty is a hefty target for discussion/derision/pity, and hence a good subject for FZ to address. Admittedly, the points made previously regarding the use of one's hands and the exercise of a little restraint are certainly valid responses, but hardly suggested or endorsed by FZ. We have to remember that FZ addressed the marriage/family issue in his own life in a manner that was as idiosyncratic and effective as his musical and intellectual pursuits -- and this perspective was always present in him. He was part of a decidedly non-traditional partnership and family that, by all accounts, WORKED. It didn't just endure -- it bloody well worked for 30 years. I've heard many folks take a pseudo-moralistic tone about stories of the band on the road behaviors of married musicians, and I am not an advocate of one way or another of dealing with such things. The one truth I see is that if two people come to an agreement about behavior that's acceptable to them both and they keep to the terms of that contract, the nature of that behavior is thier business and no one else's.

I think it worked for the Zappas because they were self-aware, open and honest with each other from the start. I challenge anyone to give me a solid example of a marriage/partnership that failed when these qualities genuinely existed from the beginning. I can definitely say that, from my own experiences, one or more of these qualities did not exist, and the failures can be directly traced to that lack.

Note that FZ did not moralize about extramarital plooking itself -- his lyrical judgment focused on the absence of honesty in people's situations as a problem worth noting and bashing. And a lack of honesty and awareness can have frightful consequences, not just to marriages and relationships, but to the world at large -- so the fact that a rising divorce rate can be linked to some form of environmental impact seems logical, since divorce represents the interpersonal consequence of dishonesty, ignorance and repression.

And as we all know, dishonesty, ignorance and repression are wunnerful wunnerful qualities that permeate, enable and perpetuate nearly all environmental, financial and human atrocities throughout history. Since these qualities have been effectively mined and perpetuated as populations have increased exponentially and the reach of the media has expanded, it's no surprise that they've infiltrated marriages, resulting in a rising divorce rate.

I think I need more coffee.